When I was young I uses to live in Prince Rupert; Like 4 years old young. It rained almost every single day and was constantly gloomy. If I had been older and known what suicide was, I'm sure I would have contemplated it.
There was almost nothing to do there and seeing as I was only in kindergarten, I still had a bunch of the day that my mom had to fill up for me after I got home from school.We lived right behind a park but going to the park was short lived. We had this demented dog named Taffy who liked to eat shit. Whenever we took him to the park Taffy would just go around eating shit. One day my mom put hot sauce on the piles of crap, because she had read somewhere that dogs hate hot sauce and that they would associate shit with hot sauce and therefore not want to eat it; Not Taffy. The dog loved it even more. He probably thought to himself what is this new form of shit I have found that tastes so Delicious? I am going to have eat double the shit until I find this again. So, if anything Taffy loved eating crap even more and we were no longer going to go to the park because of the abundance of shit everywhere.
As a pass time I did two things.
1.) My mom put up this old piece of wood on the balcony for me to paint on. Once I was done painting I asked for another piece of wood but she told me to just keep painting over the one I had. You can only paint over something so much before it becomes either black or nothing at all. I wasn't an excellent maestro of the paintbrush at 4 so I'm not sure what she expected me to create with this single piece of wood. It's not like I could paint a unicorn and then turn it into a majestic whale, it wasn't going to happen.
2.) Once I got tired of re painting over the wood I would go across the street to this forest like area. In this forest area there was this opening that was filled with thorny plants and on top of these plants lay a metal cage. It looked like it had been a gate or metal mesh door to something that had been discarded. I figured out that if I jumped on this metal cage, it would kind of bounce. I would jump on it and my foot would always slide through an opening and get cut up by the thorns, this did not stop me for doing it almost every single day.
I also used to run around and climb on things with just my Little Mermaid underwear on and a bendy straw in my hand claiming I was Tarzan.
Now I'm not sure if this is a memory or something I have made up but in Prince Rupert I entered a coloring contest at a video store. The goal was to color a picture of beauty and the beast as best as you could. when I brought in the picture, the woman said it was to good to be colored by a 4 year old and refused to give me my prize. This is why I'm not sure if this is real or not. What kind of woman denies a child from a coloring contest and calls them a liar. Even if I hadn't colored it, why did she care? Did she love working at the Prince Rupert Video Update that much. Did she take her job so seriously that she refused for anyone to try to pull the wool over her eyes. This all just doesn't make sense. The prize wasn't a thousand dollars, it was a copy of beauty and the beast on VHS. I'm pretty sure this is a real memory and if it is I hope that woman pays to this day for denying me of my true artistic ability.
Burn in hell.
I swear to god this is the picture I had to color. I hope this is real because it is still very vivid. I hope this isn't some made up memory in order to cover up something so traumatic that all my mind can do is try and protect me from it. They're watching me, I know it..........